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An Open Letter to, err, the Data Apparatus of my Alma Mater 

Dear Apparatus, Thank you, I received your email, "Data Verification for Alumni." So good to hear from you. I have missed hearing about you as well. Oh, sorry, this is 73454-M903. I understand that my Important Alumni Verification is now due...sorry, what's that you say?...oh, the Deadline is Approaching. I hope this letter reaches you …

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